Clearing up a bit of confusion

In the article recently published by the Redlands Daily Facts there was an important bit of information that was taken out of context when the story was written.

Nicholas' family would like me to make all aware that donations to the Memorial Fund, at present time, are directly going to Cynthia and Deanna to assist them financially in the wake of Nick's death. As many of us already knew, Nick was the main bread-winner for all 3 in his household (himself, Cynthia and Deanna). Cynthia and Deanna are diligently working to resolve things with the V.A., but significant costs fell upon them both in the past two weeks. Also, when the V.A.'s reimbursement does come through it will only cover about 20% of the total cost. Please know that in the distant future, if it is possible to assist families of veterans enduring similar circumstances with information and financial assistance, both Cynthia and Deanna will do what they can to continue with the Memorial Fund in Nick's name in his honor. But for now your donations are directly supporting the family in their ongoing time of need.

I thank each and every one of you who has contributed to Nick's Memorial Fund. Please check back now and then for future fund raising efforts.

Love,

Wes

From Cynthia Carter (speech given at Sunday's Memorial Service)

I am so thankful and extremely proud to have Nick as my son.  He was an exceptional son.

I want to thank you all for coming today.  The outpouring of love and support is what has sustained me through the most heartbreaking time of my life.  I remember the day Nick was born as if it were yesterday.  He was the most precious thing that I ever laid eyes on.  He never caused me one day of morning sickness and after three weeks late of his due date, I never had a labor pain.  He was an adorable baby and brought enormous joy.  He was the reason for believing in life.

I never wanted him to get hurt and was overprotective.  I used to cut his curly hair. After one of his haircuts, when he was 5 years old, he looked up at me and said, "I think you need to take me to a barber."  Growing up he loved playing sports, especially baseball and soccer.  He reminded me recently that he remembered as a toddler how I would hold my arms around him and we would hold the baseball bat together.  I'd throw the ball up in the air and we'd hit the ball against the back of the front door inside our apartment and laugh.  He also loved to act in plays at Redlands High School.  He was very artistic, which also attributed to him being an exceptional chef.

Nick had a wonderful sense of humor and he would always be able to cheer me up just by being with him.  He was generous, loving and a devoted son.  My life was always easier because he was in it.  He was a gentle soul.  A mother is the happiest when they see their child happy.  He enjoyed life to the fullest with his friends and through his accomplishments.  As he passed through his life I am so thankful he received love and happiness from all of you.  He had a special place in his heart for his Uncle Phil.  They had a special bond that will always hold.

When Nick met Deanna they were perfect together.  They loved and helped each other with everything.  They have a very special love for each other.  He lit up whenever she walked in to the room.  I was able to witness their love and devotion for each other after we moved into the same home 3 months ago.  Nick was so happy.  It was the first house he lived in.  He finally had his "man cave", which included a refrigerator stocked with Miller High Life.  The three of us would have our morning coffee in our robes in the backyard with the puppies, Annabelle and Bronson.

Nick got a new red electric lawn mower and loved doing yard work.  He really had a green thumb.  He loved chopping the firewood we collected for free.  After using the chain saw on the larger logs, he would use an ax.  He was calling himself a lumberjack and even thought of helping others chop their wood too, he enjoyed it so much.  He built the best roaring fires in our fireplace.  He could even get  the wet wood to burn.  He told me he perfected that while in the Army.  

He was getting A's in all the classes he was taking, including conversational Italian.  The class was a challenge for him since his peers were college language professors.  The class was formal and structured and Nick loved to help clarify the meaning of some of the Italian words by blurting out the "off color" version of the word.  The other students would always laugh, much to his teacher's dismay.

Although Nick's passing was sudden and came as a shock to all of us, I know in my heart that he would not want us to spend forever grieving.  Rather, Nick would want us all to remember our favorite moments spent with him.  He blessed the lives of those around him.  He was a loyal friend and generous to all.   He was a wonderful gift to this world.

A special gratitude goes out to  Deanna, Wendy, Deanine, Len, Tyler, Chelsea, Bryce, and CJ Sinisgalli, Shalia Slayton, Melissa, Nate, Ellen, Leo and Juliana Schouest, Nick, Bunny and Rick Malone, Bill, Patty, Don and Hilary Craw, Scott Brandt, Wes Vento, Tom Nolin, Cory and Emily Fitzgerald, Mike and Scott, James and Janelle Miller, Pat McCarty, Darla and Yves Ostor, Maureen Palmese, and to Cody Herrin, a fellow Army Ranger.  From New York;  the Fanning family, Jones family, Jimmy Benedetto,  Kempey family, Gary Zwick, Cindy and Dave Greenberg, Lauren, Nick Lorenzen, Vinny DeVita, Tim, Laura Franco, Dina Rabinovits, Kathy and Jeff Sprenger.  You all have been a Godsend and incredible.

Nick passed away on a full moon, so whenever you see a full moon it will be a reminder of how full and bright his life was.  Son, your humor, dedication and bravery made you great.  Now, with your transition to a greater place, allow it to make us great.  I love you with all my heart.

Dear Family and Friends,

                This has been and will be the most difficult time in my life.  To lose someone that was such a big part of me is the most difficult thing I have ever had to experience.  Nick was my best friend, my soul mate, my everything.  I knew we would have spent the rest of our lives together.  We have so many plans that are now left undone.  We were waiting until I graduated this spring to move down to Savannah, GA.  Then after I got my masters we planned to move back to his home town, Redlands, where we were going to start our family.  We had many conversations about how we would raise our children; what values we wanted to instill in them, how we wanted them to appreciate everything they had, how if they worked hard enough they could achieve all their goals, and not to let anyone tell them “you can’t.”  Nick was so excited to be a dad, all he wanted to do was to have a child so he could give that child all the love he had to offer.  Unfortunately sometimes things don't go the way we plan.  But I am so fortunate to have had Nick in my life for the past 4 years.  We have so many great memories together that I can and will hold on to.

My first memory of Nick was the day we met.  It was the first day I was in Florence.  My roommate and I had been walking around in the hot July weather so we decided to sit and rest for a little bit on this bench that wrapped around a big bush.  We were enjoying the rest when suddenly the bench started popping up and down.  We looked around the corner and saw these two guys jumping on it so we moved over to the next one.  Next thing we knew the guys are walking up to us saying “hey ladies.”  We were both like, "oh you’re American!"  We started talking with them and then slyly Nick took out a flyer for a bar he worked and handed it to us asking us to come hang out later.  We promised we’d go and then parted ways.  Later we weren’t sure if we wanted to go out but I said “we’ll just go for five minutes and then we’ll leave.”  So we went and those 5 minutes turned into the whole month.

Nick and I spent every day together after that; playing cards at JJ’s, getting espresso, and walking around the whole town.  He showed me all the good places to take photos for my class.  That month we became best friends and when I finally had to leave I cried the whole way home.  Even when I got back to New York, we spoke every night for hours at a time.  A week later I booked a flight back to Italy and asked him to help me find a place to live.  Secretly I didn’t want him to find a place and secretly he wasn’t looking for one.  We both just wanted to be with one another.

I remember the long plane ride back to Italy I contemplated whether or not I should greet him with a kiss on the lips or on the cheek.  I finally decided that I would just take a chance and kiss him on the lips.  I didn’t know that he had been thinking about this as well and since he was such a gentleman he decided to kiss me on the cheek.  When I got to the airport he was there waiting for me with flowers and a card.  I gave him a big hug and went to kiss him but instead we wound up doing that awkward corner lip kiss.

The rest is history; we fell more deeply in love with each passing day growing closer and closer.  We kept nothing from one another.  He was my everything.  He changed my life forever and I am forever grateful for that.  Baby, you have entered my heart and you'll be here forever.  I Love You!

                These past days have felt like an eternity stuck in a nightmare but the one thing that has kept me going is the love I have been receiving from all over the world.  I want to thank each and every one of you who has been there for me; comforting me with hugs and words of wisdom, keeping me in your prayers, donating to Nick's memorial fund, just being there when I need someone to talk to, setting up Nick's memorial fund and website, opening up your home to me and my family, and adopting me into your Redlands family.  I am so grateful to have you all in my life.

Love,

Deanna

Nick is remembered in the Redlands Daily Facts

http://www.redlandsdailyfacts.com/news/ci_16747086

Thanks to Joy Juedes at the Daily Facts for writing this piece and sharing with the rest of Redlands what Nick's life was all about. I'm truly appreciative of that.

Thanks Joy,

Wes